Woman on a Mission

I have been a woman on a mission lately. Project Organize My House and Keep Track of Everything Else Going on in My Life.

Know what I mean?

It's a combination of spring cleaning mode, sifting through what we have and taking inventory of what we need, and also preparation for moving. Someday. Hopefully within the year. Really, it's just making my life more comfortable with the boys who keep demanding more of our (already very small) space! But somehow, I've become addicted to progress and really want to finish... NOW.

I've given up on getting anything done when the boys are awake, so when they go down for a nap or to sleep for the night, I move into turbo gear. I try and get everything prepped for dinner, put a few loads of laundry in and straighten up our bedroom before I can do some extra organizing in the house. I'm doing really well, too. My whole apartment has been organized - every cupboard, every closet, every drawer has been emptied, sifted through, organized and put back in place. I've got piles for Good Will, giveway to MOPS and a pile for the twin sale next month. I'm doing GOOD!

Now that my apartment has had a good once over, I'd like to move into the attic. We've got about 30-40 bins with 'stuff' that I'd like to go through. Some of it will stay, some will go. Thankfully, they're all labeled and sort of organized by category, so it shouldn't be too bad once I start. Except I can't start yet. I have some responsibilities with my MOPS group that I needed to do first, including the newsletter.

My husband was taking the computer chair into the living room for me on Saturday night a few minutes after the boys had gone to sleep. We had a wonderful day together as a family and I had been looking forward to getting some work done. I had blocked two hours for the newsletter and really wanted to finish it that night so I could work on another craft I had volunteered to help with and still be in bed at a reasonable time. Andy carried the chair into the room for me and as he set it down in front of the computer, he paused to give me a hug. I reluctantly squeezed him a moment and sighed, "Babe, I've got a lot to do and really don't have the time..." Then I realized what I had said. Did I just push my husband away from a little hug? I couldn't take 40 seconds of my oh-so-valuable time to give my husband a squeeze? As soon as it came out, I wished that I could have taken it back. Except I couldn't.

I apologized and he graciously laughed it off, though I could tell that I had hurt him. How selfish of me to be so focused on what I was doing that I couldn't pause for just one moment to thank the man that was helping to make my life easier?

I learned something valuable about myself that night. I am a worker. I enjoy progress. But I need to be careful not to get so consumed with the project that I neglect the very people I'm doing it for. I'm still working my way through the house and hope to start working up in the attic soon. But I'm trying to take a few steps back. Especially when Andy is home. The work will always be there. And while cleaning and organizing are good things, they're not the only things in life. Honestly, they're not really all that important when you put them next to your family.

I'm still a woman on a mission. Except my mission is now Project Family.