My boys have been sick this week. I think it's RSV, or just a nasty cold with lots of congestion and mucus build up. Either way, it's been no fun. Up until today, I've been able to manage things alright. Up until today, I've been trying to stay positive and just take deep breaths. Up until today, I've been doing okay.
Up until today.
Jack woke up three times through the night with a nasty cough, so I finally got up at 2:45am and layed down on the couch with him until we both fell asleep. Then Ben woke up at 4:45am, so even though I only had about two hours of sleep, I decided to start the day with the boys. I got them dressed, changed their diapers and closed our bedroom door so daddy could sleep for a few more hours before getting up for work. I thought, no problem. I'm exhausted, but hey, I'll play with them for a while, they'll go back to sleep and it will be fine.
Honestly, Mindy, when do things ever go according to plan?
They went down and slept for an hour. One hour. I had barely touched my head to the pillow before I heard them crying. Andy had left for work, so I dragged myself out of bed again and picked them up. Jack was crying pretty hard in the 45 seconds it took me to get up and when I walked in, I found him sitting in his crib and covered in his own puke. Poor thing. Poor mommy.
I did my best to clean him up before getting Benjamin, who was now also crying. Once I got Jack's clothes off, Ben decided it was time to get rid of that mucus, too. At least I was ready for this one and cradled it all in a towel I had left for this very purpose so I didn't have to change his clothes, too. They wouldn't let me go. Do you know how difficult it is to clean up a crawler and keep the other one away? Woah. And they couldn't make up their minds about what they wanted either. They wanted to be picked up, they wanted to be let down. They wanted to eat, they were full. They wanted to crawl, they wanted to stand. They wanted a bottle, they wanted to play. It.was.driving.me.bananas.
There were points in the afternoon where I would just find myself staring into blank space, letting the boys roam free. They'd pull my hair, hit my arms and crawl over me a bazillion times. That alone can send someone into insanity. I called Andy and vented a bit. Thank God, he can handle it. It just helps to have someone listen to your story, empathesize with you a bit and make you feel like they want to be there to help. The difference is that I knew he wanted to.
The boys continued to be irritable throughout the afternoon, then I got a call from Andy around 2:30pm to say that he'd be home in an hour. He was coming home early. I started crying. I mean, it was Niagara Falls in my shirt. I felt so relieved. Right then, things started to feel more manageable. Okay, I can do this. Just one more hour and then daddy's home.
We took the boys for a walk after dinner (which Andy graciously bought as well) and the boys seemed to appreciate getting out of the house. I sure did! Jack threw up again just before he went down, but Andy comforted him while I took a shower. And blogged. Thanks, honey.
I don't mean to turn my blog into a venting session. But I guess it's important for me to communicate the idea that I am not perfect. This is my life. These are my struggles. I know that many of my posts make me sound knowledgeable. Experienced. A know-it-all, at times. But I'm just a simple girl trying my best to raise these boys well in a home that my husband wants to come home to. It's not easy. Lord knows I've been tested beyond what I thought I could handle. But this is real life. I don't have the answers. But I am learning. A lot.
Tomorrow is a new day. One step at a time.
Oh Mindy, you poor thing! I have been there myself; sick children, sleepless night for Mama, and the day sooooo long. Sweetie, I am so proud of you for getting through today and for being able to blog so honestly about it! You rock!!!
ReplyDeleteAnd thanks a million times for the jars. :)
Love,
Kierstin
Oh girl....I feel for you. Can't even imagine that...times two for you. For me, those are the days Dean brings home Sweet Tomatoes (a huge salad place down here--my favorite thing ever) and strangely, it makes things almost okay. Sounds like Andy is on the same page---coming home from work EARLY with food. Good man, I tell ya! Don't apologize for venting. I think it's great to get it off your chest and be human. You're a great mommy, even on the days you want to crawl into the bed and hire a nanny to care for two little sickies. All of us mommies can feel your pain. Praying for you, girlie--that you get all the strength you need to get through these long days and that your little men feel better soon.
ReplyDeleteYes have had quite a day and I too have caught vomit. You see, you know you are truly a mom when you can anticipate the vomit and be ready for it. Robyn used to get sick in the car a lot..yes, when I drove, but that is not the point :) You just learn to manage it the best you can. I have had a few of these moments the last few years and it always seems to be during Bob's tax season when I know he won't be home till 8 or 9 at night. Guess the kids know "perfect timing". But you have a wonderful husband and eventually, these will be the stories that you tell your boys when their kids are doing the same thing to them...my mom told me :) I hope the boys are feeling better soon and that you can get some sleep...a foreign concept I know.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Melissa
Aww, Mindy, my heart goes out to you. I know there is NO amount of advice, wisdom or consolation that helps in those moments...I'm sure the ONLY thing you wanted was your hubby, and it almost made me cry to hear he came home early to help you. I know the struggle of trying to meet the needs of two now, but I remember how hard the first year of being a mom was with just Ava...Twins are a double blessing and I'm sure a double struggle on many days...Big, big hugs to you today... I will pray that they start to feel better very soon and that today is a better day!
ReplyDeleteOh Mindy! You are doing a great job, even when these kinds of days make you feel completely inadequate. I hope that today is a better day for you, my friend.
ReplyDeleteAnd trust me, this too shall pass. You will look back one day and be amazed that you made it--with flying colors. :)