Men 101

Another blog contribution by my co-author, my dad.

While in a bookstore recently, I noticed a middle aged man walk in alone and begin browsing for some CDs. It was then that I came to the conclusion that most men are lone wolves. They protect themselves from risk and consider themselves successful in life if they never embarrass themselves, are able to stay alive, and stay out of jail. These protective mechanisms usually form in the Junior High years. The personalities that develop as a result of learning to interact with girls, the terrors of Gym class and the various physical changes that occur, remain with most men for the rest of their lives.

Heaven help the young man who is too short or too tall or who is different in any way than what the wolf pack (other boys) or the Supreme Court (the cheerleaders) deem normal. Life is turbulent for him. He quickly learns his place in the pack and develops his survival personality. Is it any wonder that when a boy starts Jr. High that his conversations at home morph into one word answers or grunts? When this young man grows up, we may see glimpses of who he really is, such as when he falls in love or does a brave act. But for the most part, he remains hidden.

What does it take to draw him out to be the man God intended him to be? Think for a moment about stories or movies you have seen that portrayed a man who felt called to a great task but was afraid that he wasn’t up to it. Somewhere along the line, a woman came to encourage and inspire him. She awakened the little boy inside. The little boy that was brave, honorable and justifiably idealistic before the crucible of his Jr. High School experience.

Already on thin ice, I would like to take a risk and go just a little further to offer some practical suggestions that I believe can awaken a man’s desire to serve his wife and family:

• When you put your hand on his arm, stop a moment, look impressed and ask him if he has been working out. (Donna got a new patio for this one.)
• Thank him every once in a while for going to work each day and providing for your family (It’s like saying, “sick-em” to a dog.)
• Acknowledge his acts of higher character such as good manners, a selfless work or a moment of tenderness with you or your children. (This alone, could get you a Disney vacation.)

When a man is respected, he responds. A friend told me recently, that when everything is good at home (and I think he meant with his wife), that he could face anything. A man is always aware of his wife’s level of respect for him. And even if she starts with the small things, she’ll find that it will serve him right.

Never Too Old to Learn

I'm not sure if I've complained about it too much here, but we've reeeeeeally been struggling with sleeptimes lately.

I feel like things've gotten progressively worse, but it came to a head for me last night when my parents watched the boys so I could take Andy out for his birthday. The boys pulled all the same stunts they have for the past few weeks and it took my parents an hour and a half to get them down. Yup, sounds about right.

So I wrote to my good friend from college who has five-year-old twin boys as well as a three-year-old son. She always has such good insight when it comes to parenting these little monsters and I really respect her ideas. Then I did some searches online. I wondered if I should give up their naps entirely; it just seemed like too much work for such a little reward. At the same time, though, my boys don't do very well without a few hours rest in the afternoon. Should I separate them? They seem to be keeping eachother up with their shennanigans. They like to jump on the beds. Should I put them back in their cribs and get crib tents? I know I'm exhausted being 34+ weeks pregnant; do they just know that I don't have the energy to fight? What was I doing wrong and how could I make it better?

The best article I found was here. In it, were practically ideas about soothing kids to sleep and what things I might be doing (or not doing) during the day to prepare them for a restful nap. It was all obvious stuff, but details that I hadn't thought of.

After reading the article, my husband and I talked about some small changes I could make to my day in order to help get the boys ready for a good nap:

• Limit our television-watching to two videos a day, one in the morning and another when they wake up from their nap. For a mom who never watches television herself or even introduced TV to her kids until they were two years old, we're certainly making up for lost time. Ever since I was pregnant, it hasn't been uncommon for us to have the television on most of the day, even if we're not actively watching it. Allowing my boys to unplug from the big screen was supposed to help stimulate their brains less. Gosh, I could do that.
• Limit the amount of sugars the boys are drinking and eating. When we started potty training, they encouraged us to have the boys drink as much juice as possible, as it would encourage them to go on the potty and increase the speed of the process. So we bought tons of juice boxes and flavored waters, many of which the boys still ask for. Out of laziness, I've been giving in, letting them have as much as they wanted. But I never thought about the ramifications. Between juice and the treats they still want at times after they use on the potty, their blood is constantly flowing with sugar. No wonder they're jumping off the walls! I'm embarrassed that I hadn't identified this one on my own. It was obvious this needed to change. Now, they can have a juice box with their breakfast and their lunch, then it's water for the rest of the day. They weren't thrilled about this change today, but they're slowly giving in. It's worth it.
• Take down the rails from their twin beds. I bought two guardrails to put on the long side of the beds so they wouldn't fall out during the night. But as the boys play, these seemed more like hazards. I took them down this morning and feel a lot better about them staying safe. They both sleep near the wall-side anyway.
• Do quiet activities about a half-hour before sleeptime and stay away from roudy activities. By encouraging activities such as painting, snuggling, reading and PlayDoh, I increase my changes of the boys being more relaxed than if we went straight from wrestling...which, you know...we do a lot.
• Try for 20 minutes of active play between each sleeptime. This is one my friend added. She said that her boys sleep better in the afternoon if they've played (wrestled, tickled!) for at least twenty minutes. Same for in the evening. Makes sense, doesn't it? How can I put my boys down if they're not exhausted? As a pregnant mom, I've been extremely guilty of this. Today I made a point of letting my boys play outside - which today, meant in the mud - and the boys were thrilled. I had bought rain boots last week and they were thrilled to get them completely filthy.
• Decrease the amount of sleep I allow them to have in the afternoon, making sure they're awake by 3pm. Half the time, I fall asleep and don't want to wake up. Especially when it took so much energy to get them down. But since the boys went down so much easier this afternoon, I felt good about letting them sleep just longer than an hour and a half, as opposed to two hours plus. They definitely wanted to sleep more, but it did guarantee them to be sleepy again when it came time for bedtime.

See what I mean? Kinda obvious stuff, but I suppose I had to be ready to hear it all. The other thing they said was that moms are the obvious pushover. Every kid knows that. Or at least perceives it to be that way. Dads are obvious no-nonsense. Just knowing it wasn't ME made me feel a little better. It's not me...or it is me...but at least I'm not alone.

Just goes to show you: the more you learn, the more you realize you don't know. Motherhood is a very humbling job. One day, you're on top of the world because things seem to be going so well. And then the very next day, you're in tears because you realize you have absolutely no idea what you're doing. Humbling, to say the least.

Still, onward and upward! I'm grateful for the small amount of success we experienced today and looking forward to watching these small changes make a difference in our overall happiness in the Sauer household! One thing's for sure: sleep.changes.everything.

B-E-N

Ben did something that made my teacher heart sooo happy tonight: he wrote his name.

Well, not technically. He typed it. But it was so beautiful, you would have thought he scribbled it with his own hands, from his mommy's reaction.

Ben loves letters. He points them out at a store, while we're driving, on the cereal box, and in books. He even finds them in the scribbles circles and lines he colors. And I absolutely love it. We can rarely read a book until he's identified each of the letters in the title. He's not 100% profficient and he can only really identify capital letters, but for a mom of an almost three-year-old, I'm thrilled. (Jack is quite good as well, but Ben gets an added thrill out of it!)

After the normal after-dinner wrestling, Daddy usually suggests some quiet time in front of his iPad. My boys LOVE this time. All three of them :) It's a nice way to unwind from the day, letting the boys play with puzzles, paint and animals. We use a timer to help them take turns, but tonight I thought I'd offer my laptop as the 'other option' so the boys would be occupied while they were waiting for their other turn. It was funny teaching them how to use a touch pad on the laptop versus a smart board... definitely took some getting used to for my boys in the age of the Smart Phone. We experimented with a few games on FisherPrice.com, but then I asked Ben if he wanted to write some letters. I opened Microsoft Word and pressed "caps lock."

I let him have fun with the keypad and then after a few minutes, I asked if he wanted to write his name. He knows how to spell it and does frequently. It's not uncommon for him to spell his name when you ask him to tell you what his name is :) He was definitely anxious for this project. I excitedly pointed out each letter and he thoughtfully pressed it and waited for me to help him find the next one. When we finished, he looked at his masterpiece and then up at me. He opened his eyes wide and fixed his mouth into a big "O." Oooh, he was proud.

He typed his name. Gosh, I wish I had my camera handy to take a picture of that face.

We typed it a few more times and then I helped him spell his last name, at his request. He just loved it.

Next, he asked to spell Daddy's name. But this time, he didn't want me to point out the letters for him. His first attempt looked more like "D-A-A-A-A-A-D" because he pressed the "A" too many times. But let me tell you, it was beautiful.

My boys can spell. Well, perhaps not literally... but you know what I mean.

Thank God for Technology

In the past few days, we've discovered a new tool: a TIMER!

We started using it to help the boys share games on Daddy's iPad. You know, that piece of technology I swore they would never know existed? Yeah, it's their favorite thing to play with now. Especially since he downloaded a ton of fun ABC games, puzzles and painting activities on there :) It's a good thing he takes it to work everyday or I'd never have a reason to keep it away from them! Anyway, we set it to go off after a minute and then they gladly hand it over to their brother for a turn. It's a lot better than us just saying "Okay, time's up!" With the timer, it's an external third-party telling them exactly when it's time to share. It's been working like a charm.

The thought occured to me the other day to apply this to bedtime, too. I had remembered reading it as a strategy in Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child, for kids who want to be held in the middle of the night. Dr. Marc Weissbluth suggested placing a timer under their pillow to go off after the allotted time so they would come to understand when time was up. Makes sense!

My boys ask us to sit in their doorway for "one minute," but that minute always turns into five...or ten...or twenty minutes. There'll be days that I'll (uncomfortably) sit there until they fall asleep, just so I won't have the hassle of having to sit back down again just to get them to go to sleep. And I've gotta be honest, at 33 weeks pregnant, it's just not comfortable to sit Indian-style on the floor simply waiting for two toddlers to nod off. But I do it because I'm just that desperate for a nap myself.

So tonight, I brought my cell phone with me. Yes, I've (lazily) been using the timer on my Droid. I told the boys I would hold them for one minute on the bed. They excitedly watched the timer click down, second by second, as they sat in my arms. And then they jumped down into their own beds when the alarm went off. Go figure. They jumped a little on their beds, but then I said I would sit in the doorway for two minutes after they laid down. Once they were convinced of my intentions, I set the alarm for two minutes and waited. "Two minutes up?" they incessantly asked. When it rang, Ben said, "Night, Mommy!" and I got up. I ignored Jack's cries (that lasted for about ten minutes) insisting on one more minute. I was grateful he didn't get out of bed, though. Even with the cries, it was progress!

A cell phone timer is helping my kids go to bed easier and stay there. Who wouldda thunk it?

In other news, last night was the fifth night in the row both boys woke up with dry underwear. The only reason they go through more than one pair a day is because they decide to change the character as their mood changes. I'll put a stop to that soon, but for now, this mommy is just grateful they care enough about underwear to keep it on!

Hurry, Ben Comes!

I'd just like to take a moment and brag on my husband for a bit. He is such a great friend to me and such a fantastic daddy to our boys. We are very grateful for such a wonderful provider and support to our family.

Something that means to the most to this exhausted pregnant mommy is how energetic he is after a long day's work. Every day, he comes home from a physically demanding job, and wrestles with the boys. He opens the door slowly, knowing that the boys would be hiding after hearing him press the keys to the automatic lock, and he asks where they are. The boys are not very imaginative at this point. They hide in exactly the same spots: Ben under the couch pillows and Jack behind the small couch, in the bookshelf. But still, their daddy searches throughout the room - amidst the giggling - until he uncovers their dimply faces and shrieks of delight.

Almost immediately, they want to play. Especially Jack. And his first request is always the same. "Hurry, Ben comes! Hurry, Ben comes!"

We've come to know this as a game. A game of chase. Andy scoops up Jack in his arms and runs across the room. Ben knows to follow, running after the pair as if his life depended on it. They run from one side of the room to the other, to the bedroom and through the kitchen. He jumps over Ben, dodges away from his grabs and screams as if they were this close to touching him. After about a minute (or whenever Andy decides Jack's turn is over,) he lets Ben 'get them' and he switches toddlers. Then the game becomes, "Hurry, Jack comes!" After a few rounds, Daddy is always sweating while the boys are still begging for me. It is the cutest thing to watch. My heart swells with pride that a grown man would love his two-year-olds enough to entertain their repetetive games.

Jack dancing while Daddy sings into the microphone. You can just see the admiration in his eyes.

We were out to dinner tonight and I was helping the boys catch up Daddy on our day. Jack asked if we could go home and it made me smile. If given the choice, that boy will always choose to stay home rather than go out. "Do you like being home?" I asked him. He, of course, answered affirmatively. "What do you like to do when you're at home?" I asked again.

His answer? It wasn't painting... or reading books... or shooting his Nerf gun... or playing with his brother... all of which are some of his favorite activities. You guessed it.

He responded with a quick smile. "Hurry, Ben comes!"

Sleep Training, Revisited

I continue to be amazed at the boys' potty training progress! We're coming to a close of Week Three and we're working toward 100% progress during the day and about 65% at night. I told Andy tonight, "The boys have drier pajamas now wearing underwear than they did a month ago in diapers!"

They actually LIKE going in the potty. They like being dry. They like holding it. They like when their "tummy feels better." They like "making mommy and daddy so happy!" They like waking up in dry pajamas and with dry blankets. We only woke them up in the middle of the night to use the potty during the first week; if they have to go now, they usually wake us up to go and then go right back down. They've had a few occasions where they'd start going in their underwear and then realize what they were doing before waking us up and finishing in the toilet - that's progress! I really am amazed that they have come sooo far in such a relatively short amount of time.

Our routine has been adjusted. I carry one of their toilets in the van at all times for those moments when a public restroom is just not within reach. I've even been known to carry it INTO church and playgroup to be sure they've got a familiar piece of plastic to work with when the time comes! I carry a foldable/portable potty seat (like this one, except ours is red and has Cars on it.) And I always carry at least four pairs of extra underwear and a whole extra outfit on each outing. It feels like a little more work at times, but then I remember the hassle of having to buy and dispose of diapers, finding clean areas to lay them down and the frustration of bathrooms with no changing tables... and then I feel extremely proud.

So, now that we've got potty training to a comfortable working level, we can work on our next challenge: sleeping.

Again.

Sound familiar? Yeah, I'm thinking that sleeping is going to be a constantly evolving challenge in our house. As the boys grow, they become more independent, more confident, more aware of how they effect their surroundings. The last two weeks have been horrendous sleeping weeks. It takes forever to get them down... they want to go to the potty... then they want to wash their hands... get a treat... then their brother wakes up... and they want me to hold them, sit on their bed, stand/sit at the door for "just a minute"... then it's an all-out mad house! We weren't confident enough to tell them they couldn't use the bathroom after they were in their beds - after all, they did go almost every single time - but now, we're at a new breaking point.

A few nights ago, we cut them off from getting a treat after peeing before bed. The new rule is "no treats after we brush our teeth." That was a struggle at first, but now, they've bought it. Then, we told them that they could only go potty ONE TIME before bed. And that was it. Don't get me wrong, they get plenty of opportunities to use the potty before the "last time" comes. And they'll still come out fifteen minutes later if they have to go potty, but we make it a habit not to talk to them and just shuffle them back to bed when they're done. That's been working pretty well. They definitely understand that they should not be using the potty as an excuse to get out of bed and walk around (which Jack was extremely guilty of!)

Now I've just to apply all of these things during naptime!

The boys know that mommy is extremely tired once naptime rolls around and I look forward to taking a nap just as much as I know they need one. But I've gotten extremely lazy. Now I've got to step up my game especially if I want them to be sleeping in the weeks before Baby Girl arrives... and hopefully afterward, too!

So here's my plan. Tomorrow, I'll be making four new posters with the boys. One is a checklist of things to do before sleeptime and then the other is a revised Sleep Rules poster with the rules added to it about using the potty (one for each of them.) And just like last time, I'm hoping these posters will help remind them of the process we all go through to help get us ready for sleep!

Here's hoping anyway. I wonder what my boys will do when they realize their mommy has absolutely no idea what she's doing. Hopefully, that won't be until they're the daddys struggling with how they're going to deal with their kids!

The Essence of a Mom

I know this will sound obvious to seasoned moms. Moms who've been there. Who've gone through all of this before. But sometimes, I'm just amazed at the amount of energy it takes to raise kids.

Potty training is going well. Some nights are dry, some nights are wet. Sometimes they go when we're out in public. Sometimes they demand to hold it until we get home. Sometimes they refuse to go until they wake up in the middle of the night a few hours later. Perhaps they'll make it to the toilet. Perhaps they won't.

And yet, the morning comes. And life goes on. Boys cling to their mommy. Shriek with excitement at their successes and get frustrated when they fail. But they expect Mommy to remain the same. Undaunted by the lack of sleep (even though Daddy is the one getting up for most of the nighttime bathroom breaks) or the fact that the majority of my energy is being devoted to that of another life. I am their mom. That's all they know.

I took this picture the other night of the boys before bed. They were especially huggy with eachother, grabbing at his brother's neck and giggling like crazy. It was a frustrating night. The boys were constantly wrestling, pushing and touching eachother, much to their brother's frustration. But when Andy and I saw how cute they were, I asked him to get the camera. Sometimes you just have to give in. So glad I did.

This morning was another frustrating morning. They didn't get a lot of sleep because we were out late for a birthday party. They wouldn't leave eachother alone, knowing perfectly well what would drive them crazy. They gave me a hard time about going down for a nap and I had a lot to get done. I wrote my husband a text after they finally went down and asked if we could trade them in for another set. Glad he knew I was kidding... but he did come home early ;)

And then I look at this picture. Look at those eyes. Those dimples. Those smiles. I can hear their laughs. Sense their spirits. And my heart swells with love. How could two little boys bring me so much frustration and yet so much joy?

That, my friends, is the very essence of being a mom.

And I know you understand exactly what I mean.

And the Journey Continues

I feel a little weird giving these daily updates on the boys' potty training process. I DO realize there are other important things going on in the world. But in my world, this is my world.

The boys woke up with dry underwear for the second day in a row. We couldn't have been more pleased! And Ben pooped on the potty this afternoon - and NOT in his underwear! It's only the second time he's done that so far! He's averaging one poop every other day, which I'm wondering will be the new normal. He's only seemed uncomfortable just a few hours before he goes. I'm really hoping that continues!

We went to storytime at Barnes & Noble yesterday and then I got some stuff at Babies R Us before we headed home. I brought one of their potties with us and they used it between stops, then held everything else in until we made it home. Success!

My husband made a purchase last night that we were extremely pleased with today: a new toilet seat! This is it: http://www.bemisseats.com/nextstep/. It's a magnetic kids' potty seat that goes down when they use it and then magnetically sticks to the lid when an adult needs to use it. Genius! It was $40 at Home Depot. The boys were thrilled with this purchase when they woke up this morning. They may actually be motivated to use the "big toilet" now!

The best part? Mommy may only need to clean ONE toilet, rather than three!

We weren't sure how we would make the transition from their little potties to the Big Toilet, so I asked Andy to buy this seat my friend had told me about a few months ago. Such a great idea. Ben preferred to poop in his own potty this afternoon, but the rest of their potty trips were made on top of this new piece of plastic. It's very sturdy since it's part of the toilet seat and the hole is the perfect size for their little booties. I am so pleased!

Sleeptimes still aren't a slam dunk, but they're getting better. Andy suggested I make a new rules poster to help cover our new routine (only going potty once after we read books before they go to bed, etc.) and I think that's a great idea. Perhaps we'll do that this weekend.

I'm hesitant to say that the boys are officially potty trained. But even still, in less than two weeks, I could have never imagined this kind of progress. Praise God!

Ramblings of a Mom with Toddlers

Potty Training Highlights:

Jack woke up this morning with dry underwear. It was his second time. Ben was dry the morning before last and naps have been consistently dry (with the exception of Ben on the afternoon of Day Five!) Ben didn't go poop at all yesterday, so I was very pleased when he went this morning before playgroup; his attitude seems to be improving as it concerns going Number Two! I've been out publicly with the boys twice in the past two days and both times, they asked to use the potty and we came home dry! This is definitely progress. Still hoping for more progress as Ben gets more accustomed to going more consistently.

Here's the other struggle we're having: since we've been encouraging the boys to have more control over their lives in the bathroom, they've been pushing for more independence. For a two-and-a-half year old, this translates to rebellion. Pushing the boundaries. Testing the waters. And it screamed loudest today.

Ben seemed to be the one pushing today. We were leaving for playgroup and so I let the boys play outside for one minute while I loaded the van. This is not unusual; since our van is parked outside on the driveway, the boys will commonly play with sticks on our small patch of grass while I get things situated. Ben started running down the sidewalk. He went past the sidewalk line the boys understand to be "out of bounds" and looked back to see my reaction. I reminded him that he had passed the line and to come back before he got a spanking. He kept running. He ran another ten feet and turned around. He knows I won't play this game. If I run after him, he keeps on running. Plus, I'm eight months pregnant. There was NO way I was going to engage his rebellion. But Jack was.

Jack started running after him so Ben kept on running, giggling the whole time. I yelled again and realized he was just going too far. At this point, he was about 10/12 houses down the street! I didn't know what to do! I grabbed Jack, quickly buckled him into his car seat and drove down the road to where he was floundering on the sidewalk. Ben had gotten disorientated and was starting to cry, wondering where his mommy had gone. Two cars had stopped along the road at this point, wondering who the crying toddler belonged to. I felt horrible. What a bad, unfit mother they must have thought I was.

I waved to the guy in the red car and gave him a nod so he understood that this roaming toddler was mine. He gave me a look that said, "Gosh, what are you thinking, letting this boy out all alone?" and I just kept running to Ben. He ran into my arms; I could tell that he was scared. Rather than give him a spanking, I tried to console him and remind him why he should listen to mommy. We talked about the incident on the way to playgroup and he kept saying, "I listen, I stay safe." It could have been worse. He didn't go on the road, he wasn't hit or taken and I didn't go into labor. I suppose it could have been much worse.

But that's just one example of him testing the boundaries. The other has come with sleeptimes.

The boys enjoy the new freedom of being able to use the bathroom whenever the need arises, so they've been exercising this right just as they get into their beds. This might not be such a big deal if they were singletons, or if they had their own room. But neither of those is the case. When one gets out of bed, so does the other. If not just to keep up with the excitement. Then, after both boys have exhausted the possibility of being able to squeeze out just one more drop, they're both bouncing all over the room. I can't even tell you how frustrating this is. We're not supposed to force them to go potty, but we give them more than three opportunities before 'light's out.' If they don't take advantage of those, how can I deprive them of when they DO admit they need to go?

So we're coming back to basics. We're going back to what we learned from our Marc Weissbluth education. Thank God, my husband is willing to play the heavy again. This pregnant mommy just doesn't have the energy to keep putting them back in their beds when they get out, more than once a day.

The other areas we're having issues is in hearing a direction, knowing the consequences and knowingly choosing the wrong thing. Over and over. I had to take two separate toys away from Ben today because he just wouldn't listen. They're not usually that beligerant.

So here's hoping. We're making progress. We're still trying. We're not there yet, but we're getting better. And I guess there's nothing more we could do!

Except take long walks at Target after they go down, buying a hundred dollars of merchandise I probably don't need and then coming home to blog all about it. Yeah, I guess there IS something more I could do: sleep.

Never Pray for Patience

Jack woke me up at 3:15am and said he had to go potty. He was dry. He went pee in the potty. Then he went back to bed. When I asked if he wanted me to sit on his bed for a minute (which is usually protocol,) he said, "No, you leave now, Mom." (In retrospect, I should have woken up Ben to go on the potty at this point, too.)

Ben was the first to wake up in the morning and came to our room, soaking wet. It was obvious that he didn't have to use the potty right away because the entire contents of his bladder was all over his pajamas and his bed. On the bright side, he did seem very annoyed by the fact that he was wet, so that's good.

Jack got out of bed and went to the potty again. He was still dry. The boys are making fantastic strides, but the fact that Jack woke up to use the potty and then still woke up DRY is absolutely amazing to me. He's got it. He really seems to get it!!!!!

Ben did go poop twice today - both in the afternoon and both were started in his underwear. We're still working on his timing. He's soooo resistant to let go of his feces that he starts walking too late and too slow to the bathroom. I have to let it fall into the toilet so he can feel like he's finishing it in there. We go crazy with praise, exciting phone calls and of course, a present. He's getting better. A little faster each time. Other than that, there haven't been any accidents. It occured to me today that the boys have BOTH woken up DRY from their naps since Day One, with the exception of Ben on Day Five. Can I get an amen?

Patience is a scary thing to pray for. Admittedly, I wouldn't recommend it. Because only then will God provide opportunities for your patience to be tested... err, I mean... strengthened. No, I never pray for patience. Instead, I pray for diligence. Consistency. Grace. Wisdom. And boy, do I need a lot of that lately.

The restraint needed from forcing your kids to sit on the potty, reprimanding them for wetting their bed or to let go of Mommy long enough for her to get a glass of water is overwhelming. Even still, I've been trying to make a conscious effort of letting the boys know that they are in control of their bowel movements. They get to decide when to release it. To be patient until they're ready to sit on the potty. They have the control. This makes a big difference in our day... and also makes me MORE than excited when Andy comes through the door.

So, yeah. Don't pray for patience. Unless you really do relish opportunities to let your head explode from the stress of it all!